Mr. Groundhog's Final Warning
Image via WikipediaDear Mr. Groundhog,
For several years now you and all your fancy shmancy Punxutawney, Pennsylvania neighbors have gloated that you are not only the best predictor of the end of winter, but you also are the best at predicting weather in general. While the later can be proven, you are after all much better than television meteorologists, we are rather skeptical of your performance in the former.
Case in point: on February 2, 2010 you Mr, Groundhog predicted another six weeks of winter. You were far from correct with your prediction. Within a few days we had temperatures in the 50's and no significant snowfall was recorded for the remainder of the season. We suspect that your bogus prediction was just to allow you six more weeks of sleeping your fat butt off while we all had to suffer through temperatures that fluctuated to the extreme.
At the moment you made that prediction we at Crazy as a Cool Fox vowed to dethrone you of your title and come to power as the preeminent weather predictor in the world. We have published several letters and warnings to you about vacating your premises and abdicating your position in this blog. And we all know that EVERYONE reads this blog. (see list of posts below)
This is our ultimatum: you are to have your bags packed and "bungalow" vacated by sundown, February 1, 2011. At that time we will move in and make the perfect prediction on the morning of February 2, 2011. "Groundhog Day" will be changed to "Fox Day."
If you do not heed to this warning we will be forced to take drastic measures to eradicate you, as the rodent you are. And let us tell you, those measures won't be pretty.
Mr. C. Fox